Dear Jessica
Jul 3, 2009
Dear Joe,
Darth Vader couldn't leave Luke behind? He couldn't even make it off the Death Star by himself. I think you meant to say Luke couldn't leave Vader behind, even though he just took him to Endor and set him on fire. And I kind of wish he did, because every time I watch the end of the remastered Original Trilogy, I want to punch Lucas in the face for replacing Sebastian Shaw's ghost with that whiny bitch Hayden Christensen.
Also? Luke didn't "crawl up inside" his Tauntaun. Han Solo cut it open with Luke's lightsaber and stuffed him inside. "And I thought they smelled bad on the outside?" Nevermind.
Have you ever even watched the original trilogy you scruffy looking nerfherder?
Stop writing these letters, or I'll file a restraining order.
Jessica
Reader Comments (5)
Jessica is awesome! Joe is dumb. Seriously though, do geek really write letters like this? When I renew my vows with my wife one day I think I'll throw in a little Steve Jobs mention and maybe even how she completes me like allowing a widget and page in the same Squarespace section (if only that was possible). Aw, love is awesome!
ZOMG. I love this. It's like confessions meets Gen Xer Fatal Attraction or something. Pure genius.
I have to say first I apologize for laughing so hard when I read this letter from joe....But even more so on your response! Your letter back was brilliant...and so to the point. You go Girl! Don't let Joe try to tell you that he knows more about Star Wars!. You are my hero! :)
Actually, no, Vader couldn't leave Luke behind to die. He watched the Emperor shoot evil force lightning all up Luke's business until he finally picked the dude up and threw him over the edge into the pit.
It was epic.
Ah, yeah, guess Joe could have been referring to that scene. But it wasn't really like Vader was going to "leave him behind." I mean... he was just going to stand right there and watch it happen.
Before he decided to get all epic on his ass, that is. ;)